The little voice.

You know that little voice that sits quietly inside your head and tells you that you can't do this? I hate it. I hate when it pops up and takes away the confidence in me. 

I know that it's only one week roughly to go until my first ever full marathon and I am just quietly freaking out a little. I hear that this is totally normal, however I am not feeling normal. 

Im feeling terrified. 

I know that I am ready, but I hope that my head will catch up with my body and join in the party as it is constantly telling me that I am crazy and that I won't be able to do this. I hate that part of me that doubts my abilities. This is so much more than about me. This is about showing people that you CAN do things that you once thought were impossible. It's about making a difference to the lives of people that you don't even know by doing something extraordinary. It's about showing my children that dreams do come true and that you should never ever give up no matter how hard it hurts.

There is so much riding on me doing this marathon. I look into the face  of my daughter and I want to show her that mummy fought hard to help others get the same help that she was so lucky to receive. I want to show my children that hard work gets you to your goal. I want to prove my head wrong and kick it's butt. 

I know I can do this. And when I get to around the 30km mark and my body will tell me that I can't do this, I am going to dig deep and listen to the words that so many others that have gone before me have said, I am going to think of the kids that I am doing this for and I am going to say 

yes I can